Why I Chose to Have a Home Birth

When I tell people that the plan was to have my baby at home, I most often hear comments like "Wow! You're brave!". And "Really!?!? But what of something happens?". My answers to these questions are usually surfacy and don't even skim the surface of my true feelings on the subject, and I'm sure they are ones that sound naive and that I have not done my research or am any educated on the subject. So here, you can read a more in depth account as to why I chose this route. Without getting "political" (which choices like these usually are based in a political stance or nature, my opinions are based on mere facts and extensive proven research that I have learned through my own personal research. 1) hospitals are for people who need to be treated for illness and the like. Birth is not an illness, it is simply a process. In our culture, and modern age, birth has evolved inside hospital walls as a controlled process, rather than a natural, normal process. Usually, this means that, if birth doesn't happen within a certain timeline, modern advances and even surgery are available to intervene and speed things up. For low risk women, studies have proven that, controlling the process too much, can actually hinder the natural process. for me, a low risk preggie, I am just the candidate midwives take on to do home births. 2) I am traditionalist and believer in our Creator and have faith that He created the female body to know how to birth a baby without the immense intervention our modern hospitals show today. Women have been having babies for thousands of years. Our bodies were designed to do it. Only recently have women been told that they can't do it. I have learned in my research that Hospitals function under fear of litigation and thus feel they must control every aspect of maternity care, from inductions and pitocin, to epidurals, and c-sections. I could go on and on on this subject, but the documentary "The Business of Being Born" sheds light on the true functions of maternity care in hospitals that I highly recommend anyone to view. Did you know that maternity wards are the cash cow of hospitals? Have you seen or know what a hospital labor, delivery and postnatal care costs?!? It's outrageous! The location of where birth happens is important in the fact that that place will or will not respect the body the Creator gave females by giving it the right to do what He made it to do. Midwives, are the primary care takers of pregnant women before hospitals started taking over in the 1930s, are still known to respect this process even in 2012. Midwives are trained in normal birth and delivery. Medical doctors have become interventionists to what should be normal. 3) Fear. I was scared, hands down, to have Olivia in the hospital after I had learned what I did about hospital births. Even more scared than I was to have a natural childbirth with no medication. Fear of having to surrender my body and more importantly, my baby, to staff of a hospital who were merely people just like me, in white coats and lots of years of schooling. Having to, *and this is a big one for me* ask permission to do things and also to refuse things did not settle with my "in control" personality at all. It was afterall, my body, my baby. At the same time, fear of the unknown is the driving force behind birthing in a controlled environment, and which is why it is a thriving business today. If the fear of the pain could be surrendered in females, mommys could take back the control over their own bodies and babies, for that matter. Does it hurt? Not necessarily- yes, but it's more of an intensity that is simply unexplainable. But, for me, it (the truly intense part) lasts such a short time, the recovery time for me, was less than that of the effects of an epidural or worse, an actual surgery, and baby was alert and breast feeding was off to a wonderful start. Joyous! Can birth be? 4) Having my baby in the comfort of my own home was a Spa like, customized, one on one service, like no other. With my first two, I experienced the most intense part of childbirth labor inside our car on the way to the hospital, fearing we wouldn't make it in time and I would thus be delivering my child in the front seat of the car, or in the entry way to the ER, or worse, on the sidewalk for all to see- eek! I heard "Don't push!" out of my dear husband's mouth more times than a woman should hear. And not only did I hear those words, I heard the utter terror in his voice that really bothered me- I mean really bothered me to my core. He was utterly fearful. Not only can you not control the urges to push, but it freaked Anthony out more so than he even knows. He did not want to deliver his own child- not Anthony! I decided after it happened the second time with Lilah (and after I delivered her 5 minutes after arriving at the birthing center) that people would be coming to me to deliver my child- I would be going no where! I mean after all, I was the one in labor and in pain. It didn't make sense anymore for me to have to travel somewhere to birth my child. Having the baby at home was comfortable. It was somewhere I was familiar with and I knew and I didn't have to be scared. Laboring and delivering in my bathtub was truly a spa-like experience and the water helped TREMENDOUSLY. It's interesting that hospitals don't provide tubs, isn't it? The anesthesiologists would be no longer needed and it would drive down "profits". 5) Midwives often have more training and experience in natural birth than obgyns do. Sounds strange, right? Obs have training in "controlled" childbirth. They learn the process that has been so widely accepted in our culture; that is pitocin, epidurals and births that are assisted with forceps, vacuums and c sections. A natural, normal birth in a hospital is the minority. Take a look at some simple statistics. Midwives know how to handle the long drawn out processes that especially first time births are. They know what works outside of medicine, because it really does work- it is proven. Are there exceptions? Of course, there are with anything. Midwives have better delivery rates, even mortality, than obgyns. the c-section rates in America is in the mid to high 30% range. Midwives have a less than 10% csection and transport to hospital rate. Why is that? And why are women ok with having a major surgery to deliver their baby? I feel like *fear of pain* is a driving factor, as well as ignorance to the fact that what dr says is not gospel. Sadly, they take advantage of the vulnerability that women are in in labor. 6)There are backup plans in case the home birth doesn't pan out. Hospitals are great for situations that arise that hinder a laboring mom from delivering her baby in the way God intended. We are so blessed to have so many advances this day and age that can help when the need arises. but I personally feel they should only be used for this and not a normal birth. Driving calmly to the hospital or calling an ambulance is what would happen if something goes wrong. the chances are so extremely low, however. There are risks people take every single day, its all just in how you look at it. 7) approaching having a baby with a positive attitude quelched the fear for me. I was actually excited to deliver my third baby. Not necessarily for the labor, persay, but to meet my child, to see whether it was a girl or boy were All reasons to be excited about the birth. I wasn't constantly anxious like I wS with the first two. 8) Freedom. The freedom to labor how I want with supervision from the two midwives and one apprentice who attended my birth. The freedom to utilize the wonders of warm water as pain relief and relaxation in my own bathtub. The freedom to eat what I wanted to keep me energized for the marathon that is birth. The freedom to walk around, or get my body into positions that will speed the labor right along. The freedom to not be confined to a bed, to not be strapped to a fetal monitor...etc etc. sound weird? A little hippie? It's not, it's just normal. For me, the opposite is the weird thing and shouldn't happen. More things go wrong as a result of fetal heart monitoring than without. More c sections and "emergencies" arise as a result of hearing something that may be nothing. The babies heart isn't monitored constantly in everyday life while pregnant, why should birth be different? 9). Recovery and the "hotel stay". Many people would enjoy the 2 day hotel stay the hospital offers as a part of required recovery. For me, it is unnecessary and has dollar signs written all over it, that you don't realize it until they present the bill and request payment upon discharge. Note it is required. I remember feeling so strange that I was confined to a room, feeling like I couldn't leave. And then upon departure, a system about leaving with my own baby was in place to allow us out the big locked doors. It just felt not right at all to me. At the birthing center, I was back at home by noon the morning I had her, resting and recovering in my own bed, snuggled with my baby in my arms and my mom and sister taking care of me. My nurse came the next day to my house and then 2 days after that to check my recovery. This time, my midwives stayed at my house monitoring my recovery 4 hours after the birth. Again a day after and then two days after that. Again, they came to me- how is that for service- and getting your moneys worth! So as you can see I have many many reasons why a home birth just made more sense to my particular situation. That said, i dont judge anyone for the decisions they make in regards to having their babies. I do encourage everyone to take a closer look at why things are done the way they are. And to know your rights and that they do have choices.

My favorite birth, by far, was the one that took place in my bathtub, where I laid eyes on my third daughter for the first time. Where she came right up to my chest and cried in my arms and was not taken from me ever. It was the most normal, relaxed and customized service I've ever had and one that my money was well spent for, one I had no regrets about. It was my easiest labor. I attribute that to several things: "hypnobabies" relaxation tracks, red raspberry and nettle tea throughout my entire pregnancy (toned up the uterus), and of course, my bathtub. Oh that glorious water, I can't stress enough how much it helped, having not been able to use it twice before. The most natural and soothing pain med there is. Thank you Lord for that water- ha! No but seriously! Giving birth is actually really cool. It doesnt have to be a scary thing What if the typical birth everyone hears about in the hospital didn't have to happen the way it normally does? What if all the inductions didn't take place? What if the csections didn't take place for unnecessary reasons, like "slow labor"? Would all those babies be born ok? (Which by the way, labor is supposed to be slow, especially the first born. It it nature's and God's way. And slow, according to who? The white-coated person, who has a family he/she must get home to as well). The good thing is, sub sequential labors typically go much faster. What if...women weren't at the mercy of the white-coated person telling them while they are at their most vulnerable moments probably in their entire life- that they must be cut open to have a healthy baby? Would the statistics show that in fact, the babies are ok, that women CAN birth their own babies without all the intervention? Yes, they would- because the midwifery model of care and the statistics that follow it, show this very thing- that they are ok, healthy, thriving, and even better than in a hospital, and when its left to its own devices, the way nature intended. If I could convey one thing, all opinions aside, in writing this, it would be to encourage mamas to do 2 things. 1- Research and educate yourself if having a natural unmedicated, non-intervened birth is something of importance to you because a hospital is a tough place to get what you want. And 2- don't be afraid!! Fear is normal, but try not to let it rule your decisions. Don't be scared. Relax and know that, if you are low-risk, there is no reason you can't have a natural and normal birth. Most moms who get to 5 to even 7 cm without pain relief don't realize they've already done it! 7-9 is most intense, (not necessarily most pain since contractioms just come closer together) but the shortest! If you can get to 5-7, you can do it all the way. Pushing, for many people is a relief due to counter pressure it provides. Also realize there are forms of non- med pain relief, said tub/water, and relaxation methods to help you relax and not fear. Midwives and doulas provide encouraging support to help your wishes and wants to come to fruition. That's the great thing about them. They encourage natural and normal, unlike MDs who aren't always supportive of what the natural minded mama wants, but must steer clear of litigation. Also, don't fear what people might think. Who cares!? Do what you want, what you are comfortable with- it is after all, your body and your baby. Anyhoo! I've said enough and really I could still go on and on. But I hope I've shed some light on my many many many reasons as to why after 2 kids, I decided to give birth in my own home and why, for me, it was THE BEST, and most comfortable birth I've had! So much so, I want to do it again. I wish every mama could and would let themselves have the best birth they can imagine.