Olivia's Birth Story

On Wednesday July 16th, Anthony and I had plans to have a “final” meeting with our birth coach/doula (Tammy Jordan). We planned to meet for lunch to go over my birthing plan and any last minute things. We met at Schlotzsky’s and I had noticed earlier that morning that I was feeling a little crampy- like I feel the day before Aunt Flo comes to town (hehe). Later that afternoon, I noticed strong Braxton Hicks, stronger than normal, and these ones that had a little “feeling” behind them. When I got home from work, I told Anthony that it could be getting close since the contractions were stronger and becoming somewhat regular. We went to dinner with some friends of ours and then took a long walk around the neighborhood, hoping to kick-start some early labor.

Into early morning of Thursday July 17th, I woke up several times in the middle of the night with a lot of contractions, about 15-20 minutes apart. They were becoming increasingly painful although I could for the most part sleep through them. I was pretty convinced this was the beginning of “it”. I decided to not go in to work. As Thursday progressed on and to take my mind off what was about to happen, I called a friend and we went for an afternoon pedicure. I remember her knocking on the door while I was having a rather strong contraction and thinking, “Wow, that was the worst one yet!” Thursday night and into Friday morning, contractions were much stronger and had closed in on about 5 minutes apart. Anthony called the on call doctor at the hospital close to midnight and she had advised that once I have trouble breathing through the contractions, then I should come in. Around 3 am Friday morning, I felt like I could barely breathe through them (little did I know what she REALLY meant by “can’t breathe through them”, which I explain more later), so we called and she said for us to come in to the hospital and they would check me. We got there around 4:30 am and were checked into a triage room, which was where they put people when all rooms are filled or to just check people's progress). I was immediately hooked up to a fetal heart monitor and contraction monitor. Having actually considered a home birth with a midwife, I didn’t have a good feeling about the way things were already being handled in the hospital, routine with little compassion behind it. The nurse asked us if we had any specific birthing plans. We informed her of some of our wishes: only minimum fetal heart monitoring, no pitocin, no IV confinement to bed, no eye ointment for baby, wait for cord to stop pulsating to cut, try to do it without the epidural or pain relief…etc. She maintained a somewhat defensive attitude, but was fairly cordial. I wanted to go home already. I wasn’t comfortable or ready. Anthony was very nervous and was naseous. The nurse checked me and I was only 2 ½ cm dilated. The on call doctor came in and gave me the choice to walk around the hospital for an hour and they’d check me again in hopes of progression or I could go home to rest and progress on my own. Knowing that I would not progress in 1 hour, I chose to go home. We got home at 7 on Friday morning and I slept until 11am (note, only about 2-3 hrs of sleep before the hospital and 3-4 after, 6-7 total). I woke up, and started nesting, thankful I was at home and not in the hospital. I let Anthony sleep for most of the morning into the afternoon because I knew he would need it for later. The wait for early labor to progress into active labor to was on.

Friday afternoon, things were getting pretty painful, but contractions were still no closer together. Anthony timed them and they were consistently 7 minutes apart. This totally threw us off and we could never tell if I was really progressing into active labor. Tammy, our birth coach/doula, came over at about 5 pm and she helped things along tremendously by using different positions for laboring through contractions and tools to help soothe the pain. She had a rice hot pack that I used a lot on my back, she held me as I rocked back and forth, made me some herbal tea, and massaged my hands and feet while focusing on pressure points to help labor progress. As I progressed into active labor (did not know I was as far as I was at the time), I had severe back labor and pain. As I am writing this now, I can’t even hardly remember what it felt like to describe to you. That is the amazing effect the endorphins and adrenaline have on the labor and delivery experience… they give you a bit of amnesia. But I do remember it was very intense and painful. It somewhat feels like a ball in your low back that throbs and stings during contractions. Anthony fixed us some pasta and we ate dinner. I didn’t have much of an appetite, but I knew I had better eat something for the strenuous and taxing journey I was in the middle of. 10:30 pm rolled around and contractions were still 7 minutes apart (mind you, they had spaced farther apart than the 5 minutes apart from Thursday’s contractions, which was weird to us). But here is what we figured out... In all the books and classes, you are told that contractions will become closer and stronger as labor progresses. However, since mine never got closer than 7 minutes we were thoroughly confused! Then a light bulb went off in my head, and I suggested that maybe we were timing them wrong. We were timing them from the moment I started having pain, instead of from the time my stomach would begin tightening. I noticed that after my pain was over, my stomach was still contracting, thus really making them longer and closer together in time. My stomach would never really ease up although the pain would and then I’d have mini contractions in between big ones. So we were essentially timing them from the moment they peaked, instead of when my tummy started to contract. I started having slight chills on some contractions and then would sweat through others. In addition to this, I couldn’t catch my breath during the contractions (Oh! this is what that other doctor was talking about!). These are all signs of transition stage of labor, which usually means 7-9 cm of dilation and this stage is the shortest stage of labor- yikes! Tammy suggested we call the doctor and think about heading to the hospital. The doctor took her time to call us back, but we got ready and left anyway at about 11 pm.

When we arrived, no triage room- my very own room! The front desk nurses of labor and delivery had mentioned that they had already cleared most patients out to post partum, so I was one of the only ones laboring. Our nurse, Gina, who I swear made our experience what it was, was very understanding of our labor plan and didn’t question us about it. Gina was very young, maybe my age, 26 or 27 and she reminded me very much of my great friend, Hollie Baldridge. She was spunky and cool, just there to help and serve us in our baby's birth. She checked me and said I was at 9 cm! Whoa! I couldn’t believe it! What a relief and encouragement! Gina set up my hep block (the start of an IV in case of an emergency, but I did not have to have an IV or be confined to the bed, although I didn't utilize the freedom I had to walk around and move). At this point, I knew I could do it without pain meds since I had made it this far. Having not really known where I was at in labor, had made me hope for the worst. I hoped that I was at least a 4 or 5, but a 9, that was awesome! My water still hadn’t broken either. Even though I was that far along, the pain continued to increase. My back labor was so severe, there was absolutely NO position that alleviated the pain or discomfort. I spent most of the rest of labor crouched over the side of the bed and didn’t want anyone to touch me during contractions. My breath was continually being taken away by the intensity. Looking back, I think this one position may have slowed me down. Staying in that one spot, although I couldn’t bear to move, could not have been helping me progress along, since movement and walking helps progress labor, as I saw from being at home. I should have walked around more. Gina checked me maybe an hour later and said that she may had been feeling my water bag bulging when I initially came in because I was really only at 8 cm. When you are in that much pain, 1 cm is a HUGE deal. That really discouraged me. I seriously doubted my ability to continue and although I knew pain relief wasn’t an option for me, especially at that point, I clearly remember thinking how I needed a way out, and was grieving over the reality that there was no way out except pushing her out.

I started to have the urge to push and would naturally bear down as I was crouched over the side of the bed during contractions. Tammy called the nurse to tell her that she thought I as pushing so Gina came in to check me. Even still, my water had not broken and I was not quite, but almost to a 10. I pushed using the squat bar. My low back hurt SO bad, it hurt to lay down or sit on the bed, but the squatting hurt my knees and was hard on my thighs due to my exhaustion, so I was incredibly frustrated that there was no position I found at least a little bit comfortable. Gina propped the mirror up so (this is gross…) I could see my bag of water bulging out as I pushed, trying to break it. I remember Gina holding up something in front of her in case it broke. She said they don't just break at that point, they explode. But mine never did. I pushed for about 1 ½ hrs trying to break it. Finally, I requested that they intervene to break it for me because I was absolutely exhausted.

After they broke it, Olivia was born about 10-15 minutes later. These last minutes are the blurriest and it’s hard for both Anthony and I to really remember how things went. The main things I remember are how vocal I was, yelling out while contracting and pushing my baby out, which surprised me. I did not think I would be that loud, but there was no holding back! Gina asked if I wanted the mirror to see my daughter being born and I said no. Looking back, I kind of regret not seeing my baby come out, but at the time, my reason for not wanting it was because I didn’t want to see how far left I had, in fear it would only frustrate me further; which is what happened with the water not breaking. My husband was right at my side and he encouraged me over and over, “You’re almost there, Piep, come on babe you’re almost there! Just a little longer.. You’re doing so good!” After her head was out, it wasn't too much longer that I felt her little body slide out shortly after. I am especially glad I wasn’t numb to experience the birth. I opened my eyes, looked down and saw my baby for the first time. I remember saying in relief and joy, “Oh, My baby!” Olivia Madison was born! I was so glad the pain was over and she was here. Anthony cut the cord. I only had a second-degree tear, and while I was stitched up, Olivia and I spent some time cuddling, smelling and gazing at each other. She weighed 7lbs. 9.7 oz. All doctors and midwives I saw said she would be a small baby, maybe around 6 lbs. Not sure why they even try to estimate the size; seems like they are more often wrong than right! I couldn’t believe she was that big either! She had a little bit of trouble breathing through the fluid, but was fine after she was hooked up to the aspirator. I remember feeling crampy again and I asked why. The dr. said, “You’re having a contraction and are delivering your placenta now.” I was like, “Oh yea, forgot about that.” It was kinda neat seeing the thing that helped nourish my child those 9 months. Anthony’s comment when he saw it I think was, “Sick!” After all was done, I started nursing Olivia and we began our incredible breastfeeding journey together.

At one point, it was just Anthony, Olivia and I together. This was one of the most amazing moments I've experienced in my life. He leaned over and kissed both of us and said, “I love my girls.” He told me how hard it was for him to watch me in so much pain and said he didn’t know if he could do it again. (I was thinking, “Me either!”) But told me he was so proud of me. He presented me with the most special “birthday” gift, a simple and classic diamond pendant necklace from Tiffany’s. It, symbolizing my first born, hasn’t left my neck since she was born. He continued to tell me in the days and weeks that followed how proud of me he was. I was proud of myself, knowing I had strived to have a birth that was not altered by medications or drugs (epidural, pitocin, IV fluids, anything). In anticipation of giving birth, the hardest part for me was not knowing what would happen, but this was ultimately a blessing in disguise because it helped me to give birth how I wanted. By laboring at home, I didn’t know how far along I was in the process. When I found out, I WAS doing it naturally, I HAD done it… birthing the way God intended- my body knew how to do it all on it’s own- and that is amazing to me. I was so happy she was here and I did it! Now I feel like I can do anything. Giving birth to my daughter naturally was incredibly empowering and although extremely hard, infinitely worth it.